Humor Article | Don't You Wish Wishes Came True?More Than Articles

Don't You Wish Wishes Came True?

Blowing out birthday candles, seeing a falling star, saying a word at the same time someone else does, blowing away an eyelash - although there are lots of ways to make wishes, my mother-in-law still makes surprise visits. I still wonder if I'm the only one who worries about people spitting on the cake when they blow out the candles - but I digress.

If I had just one wish, I don't know how I'd use it. I'd like my relatives to live nearby, but I know what you're going to say. Be careful what you ask for, you might get it. Okay, maybe we'd get on each other's nerves; but I have that problem with neighbors now and I'm not related to them.

Maybe I should think bigger. When it comes to people in general, I'd like them to do what they say they're going to do. From plumbers to politicians, they don't. When these "just talkers" get to the Pearly Gates, I want Saint Peter to tell them he'll get back to them.

Maybe what I want is for time to slow down - for it to pass as slowly as my hair grows. I'm always five inches from being stylish - which is ten months of hair gels, bobby pins and the awkward stages that make me cut my hair again.

No, what I want is Daylight Saving Time to last all year. I'm more productive when it's light outside. That's why I'm a morning person. Recently, because of an eye infection, I've had to wear an eye mask to bed. Now I'm in the dark about when it's morning. I'm still a morning person - just a later morning person.

Maybe what I really want is eight hours of sleep every night. I get caught up in whatever I do after dinner and lose track of time. Of course, if I really wanted eight hours of sleep, I'd look at my watch. I guess what I want is to wake up feeling like I've had eight hours of sleep.

No, what I really want is what I wanted as a child - for Santa Claus to be real. Not only would he know what everyone on my list wanted, but I wouldn't have to shop for it. If Santa was real, my inner child could wake up excited Christmas morning believing she got just what she wanted - wishes that came true.

About the Author

KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life. Take a minute to make yourself smile at http://knightwatch.typepad.com

Author Profile: kphirst

Other Humor Articles