Humor Article | Is It A Good Sign?More Than Articles

Is It A Good Sign?

Signs are everywhere - street signs, traffic signs, business signs. There are streets named after flowers, trees and states; and of course, there's Main Street - even though the townspeople have moved to the suburbs.

The traffic signs that were red are now yellow because yellow is easier to see - unless you're explaining to a policeman why you didn't stop.

Business signs should be easy to see and self-explanatory. When you see a McDonald's or a Macy's sign, you know what to expect; but don't expect to see the Pacific when you stay at the local Ocean View Motel.

Some people wear signs. No, I don't mean sandwich boards. I mean designer labels. There was a time when labels showing meant clothes were inside out.

Cars wear signs too. License plate frames from car dealerships say the driver was too cheap to buy his own frames. Bumper stickers say who to vote for, where to vacation or your child is smarter than mine.

Bumper stickers also say the drivers are optimists because they think the stickers come off easily. People who put signs on benches are optimists too. They don't think people will sit on their ads.

Some signs are taken for granted. Black clouds are a sign of rain; a shadow is a sign the sun's out; and buds on a tree are a sign of spring - unless you're in a beer garden.

Other signs have personal meanings. Finding a penny means you're lucky. Being born in the year of the pig means you want to keep the peace - more politicians should have been born in the year of the pig. Having less elastic in your skin and more in your clothes means - the inevitable.

I'm at the age when I take a "Steep Decline" sign personally; and as a blond, I've always thought "Dip" signs were insulting.

Blood pressure, pulse and temperature are vital signs. Without them we'd sign off. A tooth ache is a sign to see the dentist, a back ache is a sign you shouldn't have lifted that box and a headache is a sign - you have children.

However, not all signs are that easy to read. A child complaining about feeling sick could be a sign of a math test.

Nevertheless, all signs are handy. In fact, the hand can make several - hello, good bye, peace, okay - and yes, the one that's not okay.

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KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life. Take a minute to make yourself smile at http://knightwatch.typepad.com

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